Where Did We Go Wrong

Where did we go wrong?

When did the future only pertain to who I am going to be and where I am going to go? When did love limit itself to my family and a futuristic the one? When did we start thinking there is nothing that can be done to change the world? When did going to Church replace responsibility to Be the Church? When did my life, become My Life?
Where did we go wrong?

Maybe you have started asking these questions too. The last few months have been filled with lots of questioning, seeking, and learning, responding, growing, trusting, doubting, sharing, and waiting. You see, sometimes, I think we get so caught up in the questions that we lose sight of Who may have instilled them and better yet, Who can answer them.

Three years ago, as a high schooler, I faced that all too typical period of “oh goodness, I have to discover myself, I have to make a lot of money and be good at what I do—because forever is a long time!” Silly me. If only I had known that forever is subjective, or as James put it better(4:13-14)

Now listen, you who say, "Today or tomorrow we will go to this or that city, spend a year there, carry on business and make money. Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow. What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes.

I always knew I wanted to help people…or when I’m really honest with myself, I knew that I should help people. So my eventual conclusions to become a doctor, save the world, have fun with solving big problems and make decent pay to fund my dreams to do a short-long-term mission stay, not be dependent on anyone else, travel the world and build my own house out in the beautiful country somewhere seemed all so perfect. It wouldn’t be easy, but nothing worth having is. As I struggled my way through, these “dreams” started to “crumble”. While I was actively seeking God, I wasn’t opening my eyes to the doors He was opening. Our gracious God gives us freedom to explore and make decisions. We aren’t locked into a “plan” that must be sought out to the very detail- but I look too much liberty knowing that and failed to see that He has instilled gifts and passions and interests and talents in areas that I never gave fair consideration.

Is this true for you too? Do you really desire security in your future? Here’s the thing: that’s okay! We should be planning responsibly- but we shouldn’t let it define the future that we do not hold for certain. The concept of community has permeated into my reading material, conversations and classes lately. We all know that God provides. We all know He expects from us. But He knows we won’t be perfect and we won’t always know everything. This is why He’s so gracious. We need it. Thankfully, He’s ever present and as we draw near to Him –He will draw near to us. But also, He’s blessed us with the Church –the body of Christ, the believers. Not the building. This body is dependent on each of its members in the same way my ears so desperately depend on my eyes. When one is weak, the other is strong. They share everything as they have need (Acts 4:32-35)

All the believers were one in heart and mind. No one claimed that any of their possessions was their own, but they shared everything they had. With great power the apostles continued to testify to the resurrection of the Lord Jesus. And God’s grace was so powerfully at work in them all that there were no needy persons among them. For from time to time those who owned land or houses sold them, brought the money from the sales and put it at the apostles’ feet, and it was distributed to anyone who had need.

Perhaps my thoughts are incoherent. I’m sorry. This is just some of what’s been on my mind. For those of you who seeked (yes this is my new word) alongside me, I just only hope that you learned and were blessed too. This season has been a time for pruning (let’s use rose bushes- the ones blooming on campus are gorgeous). The shears are sharp and one stroke doesn’t prep the bushes to yield beautiful roses in the next season –it takes work. It takes time. It takes rain. It takes worms. It takes sun. And it takes the love of our Master Gardener.

Let us draw near to God with a sincere heart and with the full assurance that faith brings, having our hearts sprinkled to cleanse us from a guilty conscience and having our bodies washed with pure water. Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for he who promised is faithful. And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds, not giving up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching. (Hebrews 10:22-25)

For this reason, I’m going to try and make it an effort to post on each of the questions I posted above. Many of y’all are far and away- and have shared in this season too. Some may be long from this season but have lots of wisdom to impart. Others may have no clue right now, but might start asking some questions. Simply put- if we truly are The Church, we need to reexamine how we look at our lives and what characterizes it. It doesn’t stop there, though. That would be too easy. I believe that we are being called to something greater –to true community. If that’s the case, then we all have something to offer to the table. And this is not because of anything we’ve done or we’ve experienced. It’s because we serve a good and gracious God.

So what’s the answer to these big “when” questions? When we really meant me and therefore my sight was too narrow to see Him in the picture.


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