Friendship, God, and Knowing
Saturday afternoon my grandmother, sister, brother, and I sat around the living room discussing salvation and baptism. It was an interesting conversation that began after we got home from Papa Amos' funeral.
That service was by far the most beautiful thing I have been a part of in a while. To witness the legacy that he created and left was incredible and I can only hope that my life and the lives of those I love are following in similar footsteps. You see, there is a sense of grief for those of us left behind, however, there is immense joy for Amos. And that joy cannot be contained. A joy that springs from a knowing that Papa Amos knew His God. Throughout the service I heard story after story of a man who invested in people's lives, quietly, without programs or special terminology but simply because he could and he loved them. For all the occasions he would pull me aside for a kiss on the cheek (in front of who knows how many Cracker Barrel waiters) and say "I'm real proud of you, you're my special girl. Don't forget that" I heard the same story in another person's perspective. It wasn't that he generalized and blanketed his love, but he had a lovely way of making each person aware of their worth, especially in his eyes. He did not settle for low expectations, but demanded much from those he loved. If you could grow a rose bush, you better grow the best darn bushes you know how, if you had a little sister you'd better treat her with the most kindness and love you can muster, or as he often reminded me- if you can swim, you swim as well as you can and get to know those around you. You see, he understood the power of knowing and relationships in everything we do.
The auditorium was full of family and friends. Now, when I say friends I do not mean acquaintances. Think about that for a moment. These people had more than a fondness for the man, they knew him. And he knew them. Papa Amos was a quiet, reserved, introvert (I think this is why I was drawn to him so much) and yet, these scores of people were known on an intimate level. I find that incredible because when we start thinking about how large our friend base is, how much of what we perceive as friendships are true friendships? Or have we settled for mere acquaintances? What I have observed lately is the power of knowing another person. In a conversation with a friend this past weekend, we discussed this idea.
We pointed out that our true friends can be counted on our fingers. These are the individuals who know the intimate details of our life- the things that make us tick, the goals and aspirations we have and that we also have for those we care about, what makes us upset from a pet peeve standpoint and what can shake our core, those we can discuss spiritual heart matters with, cry in front of from both laughter and sorrow, the person who not only encourages you, but has expectations from you and holds you accountable, the person who knows what causes you to stumble and therefor doesn't suggest or mention it in your presence- better yet, without you're ever knowing they give it up all together for you. These are friends. These are friends because they know us and we know them.
Acquaintances are good and healthy, but we must be careful not to confuse them with friendships. I'm not suggesting we all go and try to have 200+ intimate friendships, because that is not feasible. You cannot be present with that many people at one time. However, what I took away from the funeral was that he cultivated those friendships over periods of his 87 year lifetime. Obviously changes locationally, vocationally, etc led to changes, but the relationships remained. For a friend from decades ago in Alabama to drive in his 80s to say goodbye- that says alot.
We cannot know everyone, but I think that true relationships rest on the power of intentionally knowing another person. I think this is an aspect that makes us most like God.
Back to the baptism discussion, we were talking about how salvation is viewed amongst different circles of Christians. For my traditional background, baptism is the final step that "seals the deal". However, as I've been exploring and questioning that idea, it has come up in our study at church, in small accountability conversation, and in personal reading. We mentioned in class the other day that it is a step that must occur out of obedience. But a lifetime of growth should follow. God did not just create us to be dunked in water and call it good. God created us to be with Him. With this in mind, the Christian walk is in fact just that, a walk that neither begins nor ends with baptism. We have already been saved. That was done 2000+ years ago on a cross. Christ loved us and gave His life up for us. We've heard that a million times, but hear it again: He's sealed the deal. Now what we have is a point of recognition of our need and then acceptance of such a sacrifice. What follows is what God has desired from us all along... As we debated this idea and how we would approach a scenario if a five year old comes to us wanting to be baptized, my grandmother left the room. She walked back, sat in her recliner, and opened to Jeremiah 9.
A lifetime of growing in understanding to know Him. For this is what He delights in. In friendships, in our relationship with God, it should be characterized by becoming like Him- the One who is kind, just, righteous, and who knows.
That service was by far the most beautiful thing I have been a part of in a while. To witness the legacy that he created and left was incredible and I can only hope that my life and the lives of those I love are following in similar footsteps. You see, there is a sense of grief for those of us left behind, however, there is immense joy for Amos. And that joy cannot be contained. A joy that springs from a knowing that Papa Amos knew His God. Throughout the service I heard story after story of a man who invested in people's lives, quietly, without programs or special terminology but simply because he could and he loved them. For all the occasions he would pull me aside for a kiss on the cheek (in front of who knows how many Cracker Barrel waiters) and say "I'm real proud of you, you're my special girl. Don't forget that" I heard the same story in another person's perspective. It wasn't that he generalized and blanketed his love, but he had a lovely way of making each person aware of their worth, especially in his eyes. He did not settle for low expectations, but demanded much from those he loved. If you could grow a rose bush, you better grow the best darn bushes you know how, if you had a little sister you'd better treat her with the most kindness and love you can muster, or as he often reminded me- if you can swim, you swim as well as you can and get to know those around you. You see, he understood the power of knowing and relationships in everything we do.
The auditorium was full of family and friends. Now, when I say friends I do not mean acquaintances. Think about that for a moment. These people had more than a fondness for the man, they knew him. And he knew them. Papa Amos was a quiet, reserved, introvert (I think this is why I was drawn to him so much) and yet, these scores of people were known on an intimate level. I find that incredible because when we start thinking about how large our friend base is, how much of what we perceive as friendships are true friendships? Or have we settled for mere acquaintances? What I have observed lately is the power of knowing another person. In a conversation with a friend this past weekend, we discussed this idea.
We pointed out that our true friends can be counted on our fingers. These are the individuals who know the intimate details of our life- the things that make us tick, the goals and aspirations we have and that we also have for those we care about, what makes us upset from a pet peeve standpoint and what can shake our core, those we can discuss spiritual heart matters with, cry in front of from both laughter and sorrow, the person who not only encourages you, but has expectations from you and holds you accountable, the person who knows what causes you to stumble and therefor doesn't suggest or mention it in your presence- better yet, without you're ever knowing they give it up all together for you. These are friends. These are friends because they know us and we know them.
Acquaintances are good and healthy, but we must be careful not to confuse them with friendships. I'm not suggesting we all go and try to have 200+ intimate friendships, because that is not feasible. You cannot be present with that many people at one time. However, what I took away from the funeral was that he cultivated those friendships over periods of his 87 year lifetime. Obviously changes locationally, vocationally, etc led to changes, but the relationships remained. For a friend from decades ago in Alabama to drive in his 80s to say goodbye- that says alot.
We cannot know everyone, but I think that true relationships rest on the power of intentionally knowing another person. I think this is an aspect that makes us most like God.
Back to the baptism discussion, we were talking about how salvation is viewed amongst different circles of Christians. For my traditional background, baptism is the final step that "seals the deal". However, as I've been exploring and questioning that idea, it has come up in our study at church, in small accountability conversation, and in personal reading. We mentioned in class the other day that it is a step that must occur out of obedience. But a lifetime of growth should follow. God did not just create us to be dunked in water and call it good. God created us to be with Him. With this in mind, the Christian walk is in fact just that, a walk that neither begins nor ends with baptism. We have already been saved. That was done 2000+ years ago on a cross. Christ loved us and gave His life up for us. We've heard that a million times, but hear it again: He's sealed the deal. Now what we have is a point of recognition of our need and then acceptance of such a sacrifice. What follows is what God has desired from us all along... As we debated this idea and how we would approach a scenario if a five year old comes to us wanting to be baptized, my grandmother left the room. She walked back, sat in her recliner, and opened to Jeremiah 9.
...This is what the Lord says:
"Let not the wise boast of their wisdom
or the strong boast of their strength
or the rich boast of their riches,
but let the one who boasts, boast about this:
that they have the understanding to know me,
that I am the Lord, who exercises kindness,
justice and righteousness on earth,
for in these I delight,”
declares the Lord.
A lifetime of growing in understanding to know Him. For this is what He delights in. In friendships, in our relationship with God, it should be characterized by becoming like Him- the One who is kind, just, righteous, and who knows.
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